butter fingers

oh geez, i love this clip, her glove is wicked. his style is admirable...i think



I'm attracted to the high life. Went to a fancy place last night, entered rigid and slightly horrified, exited having made friends with the bartender- a beautifull 23yo who made me my first martini . I loved it. I plan to go again, not to dine, but to sit at the bar, talk with my new friend enjoy the deco, etc, etc, occassion to look good, forget pretences, forget patterns and feel like a night could be worth more than my bank has ever held.

At present, my thoughts elude my commitments. I said I'd think about things, important things and do things, things that resemble responsibility...thus far my words and actions have not equated any of these. I daydream and I wonder what it would be like to be "free" - whatever that means - not confined by either my two digit bank account or my fears...and responsibilities.

Hello God, I've been avoiding you of late...
I need to find you or my limitless and pointless and selfish desires will consume me and I will have wasted much time when you by far surpass these. I'm looking for validation again and I know where to find it, I don't know why it takes me so long to return to you. Seeing my friends' apparently satisfying validation via other means deceives me. I have none but you here, none but you near. Now where's that bible?