i have decided, the worst feeling ive ever to encounter, is a headache. (I've yet to feel grief, never had one close enough to me dissapear for any reason *phew)
Simply a headache! Or whatever it is i get ever so rarely. The throbbing, the uneasiness, my inability to sleep easily, the weakness I feel in standing, the...pain. I don't know the difference between headaches and migraines; but my "headaches" at it's most merciful have left me thrown up once only.

I don't like having to use panadol or any sort of pain killer (I can't stand the thought of lowering my threshold for pain, believing myself to be "tough enough". I keep telling myself I will weather through it, it will pass...but it doesn't) , I am reluctant but somewhat forced to turn to the aid of a little white pallet. Last night, to my horror, I needed two.

And it still took me an excruciatingly long hour and a half to get to sleep, with the occasional groan. This is from the girl who finds easy refuge in her bed and is comforted by soft blackness within the average 5minutes flat!

I think what I hate about it [the headaches] is that the pain drives me to think selfishly. And that i couldn't really give a stuff about you while my head throbs, because...well, because I can't seem to feel anything outside my own pain. & since my brain seems to conduct everything, I guess it renders me "useless" for a time since my every fibre would revolve around the simple scream: "make it stop!".

my point?
i don't think I have one.
i just don't like headaches! or migraines, or whatever makes your head throb!

ps: quick thanks to Journey, I love you guys, thanks for the prayer, your hands kept me standing!
pss or pps: thanks to God who snuffed me out of my miserable consciousness, and woke me in beautiful morning bliss!

it's times like these, times of pain, when I remember and reappreciate the absence of it.
No pain is a blessing rather than pain is a cursed scene.

love! i do, i do.
pppss: please forgive, friend, please forgive,.